


Now You're Speaking My Language

by Mae_Liz



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Gen, Prompt Fic, Tumblr: luciferprompts, all the languages, christ on a pike there is a lot of dialogue, not really it's more like 6, thank god for google translate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 13:45:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14262291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mae_Liz/pseuds/Mae_Liz
Summary: Lucifer accidentally uses something other than English while at the precinct and it quickly turns into a display of linguistics.





	Now You're Speaking My Language

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this prompt](https://luciferprompts.tumblr.com/post/172742623782/there-are-moments-when-lucifer-switches-to-other) submitted to [Lucifer Prompts](https://luciferprompts.tumblr.com/) on tumblr.

Lucifer’s smile faded. He and Dan had been on good terms recently so he figured wishing the man a happy birthday was the polite and friendly thing to do. Heck, he even got the detective a card. So why was the usual LAPD trio staring at him?

Mentally, the devil recapped the past few seconds. There were admittedly times when he was rude without meaning to be, and he scrutinized his choice of phrase silently but found nothing out of the ordinary. _Happy birthday, Daniel_ was what he said. It had been cheery and sincere and… **fuck**. Lucifer repeated the words in his head, and his shoulders momentarily slumped before adopting his usual immaculate posture. He did wish Dan a happy birthday, just not in English. 

It came out as “ _Честит рожден ден Даниел._ ”, and he couldn’t believe it.

Ella, unsurprisingly, was the first to regain control of her faculties and she was clearly excited. “Was that Russian?”

“Bulgarian, actually, Miss Lopez.” Lucifer corrected. “But very close. B+.”

It was like his mouth had a mind of its own. First there was the Mandarin a month ago, followed by the Swedish, then the German; and who could forget the time he complimented Chloe in Latin? Granted the detective was all smiles after he translated for her, but it would have been better if she’d understood it the first time. The love languages were all rooted in the dead one, after all.

“So that makes what, five now?”

Dan shook his head at Ella’s guess. “At least seven. He ordered from a taco truck in Portuguese last week-”

“I’ll have you know that Portuguese and Spanish are **very** similar, Daniel. Thank you.” Lucifer interrupted, trying not to show his bruised ego.

“-And he taught Trixie how to curse in French.”

“You taught her what?!” Chloe barked at both her partner and ex-husband. Why was this first time she was hearing about it?

“Oh, that one’s rather funny actually. _Dieu baise la reine._ ” The devil chuckled softly. “It means-”

“I don’t need to know what it means. God, Lucifer, you can’t just teach a nine year old exotic swear words.”

“Yeah, yeah, tragic. What I want to know is how many languages you speak, because this is like some sort of Tower of Babel thing.” Ella cut in, and a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. The team forensicist was certainly on the right track.

“Well I’m definitely more linguistically gifted than most, I promise you.”

“That’s not a number.”

“Yes, about that… Unfortunately I’m unsure on the exact amount.”

Next to him, Dan scoffed with a small shake of his head. The more time he spent around Satan the more he began to believe that no man on the planet had a chance against their consultant. “How do you forget something like that, man? Is it some ridiculous number like ten?” Lucifer’s silence indicated it was more than that, and the detective dropped the unopened card to his desk. “I need coffee.” He grumbled while heading to the kitchenette. “It’s too early to have this conversation without coffee.”

“You know, I’m curious too.” Chloe added, now half-leaning against her own desk and looking skeptically at the Brit. “Is Dan right? Is it more than ten?”

“Daniel is correct on that front, yes.”

“So, what… Fifteen? Twenty?”

“I can tell you with absolute assurance that it’s over fifty.” Lucifer knew it was an exponentially low estimate, but it still wasn’t one they’d believe. Something which was proven by Chloe’s awkward laugh.

“That’s not possible. No way do you speak fifty languages.”

The devil grinned at the challenge. “I’d be happy to demonstrate if you like.” The offer may not have been one of his best ideas, but it would certainly make the morning more fun. 

“Fine, alright. What about Hebrew?”

“Well that’s a rather boring choice, but so be it... _אלוהים הוא שקר._ ”

“It sure sounds like Hebrew.” Ella defended but Chloe wasn’t convinced.

“Yeah, but what does it mean?”

“It means my dad sucks.” Lucifer explained and the detective rolled her eyes. 

From her spot leaning against the lab door, Lopez raised her hand, even though she didn’t have to. “Do you know Swahili?”

“ _Bila shaka mimi._ ” The dialect left both women speechless and Lucifer cocked his head to one side triumphantly. “I do believe it’s your turn to pick again, Detective.”

“What’d I miss?” Dan asked Ella when he snuck back to join them, cup in hand.

“He said he knows more than fifty so we’re testing him to find out.”

Meeting Chloe’s request for Danish, Lucifer casually announced, “ _Den lille havfrue er mere tragisk end alle tror._ ”, and Espinoza’s eyebrows rose in surprise.

“That’s a lot of Rosetta Stone.” He mumbled against his drink; switching gears when Pierce’s office door swung open.

“If you’re done speaking in tongues out here, we’ve got a case. A dead body was found at Dodger Stadium. I already sent you guys the info so let’s get to it, huh?”

“ _تو جالب نیست، ستوان._ ” Lucifer quipped and the Lieutenant’s arms folded over his chest.

“Well, I’m your boss. It’s not my job to be fun.”

Instead of heading out, all three mortals found themselves frozen in place and gawking at their superior.

“You… You **understood** that?” Chloe asked slowly and a barely-there smirk took over Pierce’s features.

“Yeah, of course. It was Persian.” He simply said before heading back into his office and shutting the door behind him. Leaving the precinct with a whole new batch of questions.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what business I have writing a ficlet at 12am, but I'm in love with this piece.


End file.
